You may have noticed in talking to your siblings: choosing someone to care for the children, after the loss of their parents, is gut-wrenching and difficult!  In fact, for many families, it’s the hardest part of planning their estate. It’s not easy to think of anyone else, no matter how loving, raising the child you love. Yet, it can make a tremendous difference in the child’s life by planning ahead. Talk to your siblings about this, as they have nothing to lose except a few moments thinking about what they value most in life, and in childrearing.

Anyone with a child under the age of 18 must consider who would raise that child if they
were unable to. Of course, we all imagine the worst case scenario – premature deaths – when we consider this. But there is a less tragic, and common, situation in which naming a guardian is crucial: incapacity. If your brother or sister were unable to care for their children for a time, who would watch over them while they recovered their abilities?

The younger your child, the more crucial this choice is, because very young children cannot form or express their own preferences about caregivers. Encourage your siblings.  Let them know by naming and talking about their choice of guardian, they can encourage a lifelong bond with a caring family.

The nomination of guardians is a straightforward aspect of any family’s estate plan. It can be as basic or detailed as they want.  Parents can simply name the guardian who would act if both were unable to.  Or they can provide detailed guidance about their children and the sort of experiences and family environment they would like for them. The state court, then, can give strong weight to your sibling’s expressed wishes. If they have “chosen” guardians, but have not legally named them in binding documents, their choices may not be honored should a family member or friend petition the court, or if the person they have informally chosen is not available.

So how do your siblings actually choose the right person or couple?  We have a few hints to get them heading in the right direction.  Stay tuned for our next article which will give you more detailed steps that guarantee your nieces and nephews will never spend one minute in the hands of someone your siblings wouldn’t want!